Phobia, as defined as Merriam-Webster, is an exaggerated usually inexplicable and illogical fear of a particular object, class of objects, or situation. My BIGGEST phobia? Failure. I can feel at home at night, alone, in a graveyard. I can stare a clown in its face. I can stomach standing at ridiculous heights, even though I’d rather not. But I can do it, because it isn’t a phobia. But failure is a completely different story.
The mere thought of failure keeps me up at night. Stressing. Sweating. Sick. Scared. Shaking. I know I sound like a strung-out fiend, but in a sense, I am. The only thing is, my drug is my accomplishments. Only they can fight of my phobia, and keep it at bay for another day. Like all other fiends, my dosage needs to increase over time. My craving grows to gigantic proportions, and become difficult to quell. So, its on to bigger + better accomplishments. And there lies the problem. What is the next thing? What is going to keep me from being a failure? I’m starting to feel queasy again….